When your children are young it is easy to make decisions for them. What they wear, what they eat, who they come in contact with, are all pretty much controlled by us the parents. But as they reach school age some of that is transferred to others, teachers, officials, and others start to control some of their hours of the day. As parents we make sure the school, and those we give that trust to, are up to our standards. If we think our local schools are not up to this challenge we do something about it. As our children reached school age we didn’t like our local schools. We couldn’t afford to put them into private schools, so we looked for somewhere else to raise our family. We ended up moving to Colorado and we have been very happy with the move for many reasons, but primarily because it was good for our kids. Does that sense of responsibility change if our children are adults? If our child doesn’t have the ability to make wise choices for themselves, do we not try to do what is best for them? No matter how old our children get, we are always looking to help them make choices. I know not all parents have the ability to make good choices for themselves, let alone their children. I am making a generalization here, but for the most part I see no one else with the best interest of a person, than his or her parents. That is why I find this story so aggravating. This week I came across a story of a 32-year-old woman with special needs who is pregnant. Because of her special needs her parents have been her court appointed guardians since she was 18. Due to the circumstances the woman and her family have decided to go through with the pregnancy and are talking to perspective couples eager to adopt the baby. You can read one article about it at this site: (Go to Article) You can imagine for this family this is not what they wanted to happen. I am sure they have agonized over what to do, how best to deal with it, and have talked it over as a family to come to the conclusion that this is the best path for them. I don’t see how anyone outside of this family can have the perspective they have, or could make a better decision. Yet when the local Social Services got involved they decided they would override that process. This family is now forced to go before a court and prove they are making the best decision, or the court may make them end the pregnancy.
I know the arguments for life, and I believe them. But not everyone who will read this will agree with the right to life. I know the arguments for individual rights and I agree with them, but again not everyone agrees the state doesn’t have an interest in this. Saying that every parent has the best interest of their child, like I said before is not always true. The folks at Social Services can tell you horror stories and are at best jaded by case after case of neglect they see. What is so aggravating is that the state had to bring this to the court at all. If this was a fourteen year old girl the parents would be in the same exact situation. Yes it is a little more complicated, but is it so different for a girl of fourteen who does not have the mental capacity to make the best decisions? Yet groups want these children to have the right to go to the local abortion clinic without telling anyone! What about groups who want to force sterilization on woman with special needs? If a fourteen year old is able to have a child should we sterilize her, or put everyone on birth control so it won’t happen? What this story comes down to is a family. They have gone to court to get guardianship. That means the court has said they are the people who are best suited to help their daughter with life decisions. This didn’t happen yesterday, they have been guardians fourteen years, and her parents for all thirty-two years! At best social services looks at her file twice a year, and makes a home visit, to check off the box on her file. I always hear the argument that it is a very personal choice. That is the argument isn’t it? It’s personal! Why then is deciding to carry this child not personal? When I look who has the best interest in this case I see one side making a very personal decision and another side with an agenda. The decision to have the child and put him or her up for adoption may not be the simplest answer, but it is this family’s to make. One the courts and social services should stay out of.