I'm not fond of making new years resolutions. For me, it is a surefire way to fail at them. It may be that I am a contrarian or that there is too much pressure at the beginning of the year to start fresh. Whatever the case, I decided years ago not to set my goals to start on New Year's day.
It isn't that I don't have goals. It is that I decide randomly through the year to set small ones. Even if I choose one at the end of the year, I will start it in February. Changing up the start of my goals helps me to avoid putting the pressure of failure on them.
One of the buzz terms these days in business is setting SMART goals. SMART goals stand for, Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-Bound. But, for us special needs parents, we need a different acronym. I can see Specific, but Measurable is troublesome to me. Just like the growth chart in the Doctor's office, it makes me look at what others have done, and we all know our kiddos will get there in their own unique way. But, unfortunately, it's likely different from the way we planned.
Achievable can be frustrating. Have you ever watched a kid learning to tie their shoe? Watching them struggle while I could do it for them in a quarter of the time. But if I let them, they will learn the skill. Watching our children struggle is never a favorite for parents, but it is necessary.
Relevant is important. If I set a goal for my son to run a marathon, I am only fooling myself. Cerebral Palsy and the multitude of surgeries have ruled that out. But self-care, dressing, and other skills are essential and would make a difference for parents and kids.
Finally, Time-Bound. You and I know we just toss this one! Like measurable, we lost the ability to set when things are going to happen or how they will happen. We are on a unique path, like trying to put a genie back into a bottle, it ain't gonna happen!
So my suggestion is SARC.
The C is for celebrate. We need to celebrate every win, no matter how small. The road we are on is challenging. We must remember our successes to know we can succeed in the future. And to have the strength for the next SARC we set.